Sunday, July 25, 2010

Farts beat YW 6-3

While i was relaxing in the hotel bar, eating a nice prime steak and watching the Wallabies demolish the woeful Springboks i momentarily considered the impact of poor and cheating officials upon the games we love.

The Springboks seem to be struggling because they now have to play with referees that don't just penalise the opposition and turn a blind eye to their prehistoric thuggery.

Fast forward 24 hours, and the news headlines in the Sydney herald are "Farts win despite cheating umpire". Devil-liers was interviewed by Channel 7 news, and was quoted as saying "you know i can't say anything, as I've been told not to, but if i did say something, which I'm not, then i would probably be saying that one of the umpires was biased, but good thing im not as then i'd have to apologise and it wouldn't look good for God to say he was wrong would it!

So the Farts came out eventual winners of a game that seems to have been well umpired at one end and well, one sided at the other.

For all the news lets cut over now to Robo, our on the spot reporter at the hockey

The pre-game was quite a trip down memory lane for the players, having played in the dark for the last few weeks we had forgotten what we looked like in sun shine. So we had time to reacquaint ourselves and catch up with one another’s lives. Families, hobbies, pets etc.
It was a game of two halves, the first half and the second. Luckily with only one sub the team made it through both. Nae Nae starting the strongest with good passing up front and a couple of near misses waking the opposition up to the fact Nae Nae had turned up to play and not only to chat to the ref.
After a couple of strong breaks good passing across the goal mouth saw Needles in good position to knock the ball in the back of the net. After another good spell we had  Legs  and Scotty bring the Farts 3 – 0 up. YW were beginning to look a little worried as they had the youth and speed. However the farts have seen this combination before and stood strong. YW came back of two well worked corners and the Farts went to half time 3 – 2 up, but with YW with the momentum. Another good stirring talk from Richard L  about keeping the passing going and keeping the talking going saw the Farts back on the field with the sun at our backs and the wind in our main sails. Good passing from for the first 20 minutes again delivered a string of good goals from, Cam, Scotty and Legs to put the Farts firmly back in control and had force YW into longshots and weak passes. Most of which we intercepted. Remembering the half time speech about talking we really started to kick in with the oppositions ref for the blind  getting most of it. The result was after several attempts YW managed to get another corner. This was followed by Adrian having a short spell on the side line as the ref was beginning to feel the strain and get stroppy. Even taking offence at Scotty’s laughing. Paul missed a sitter and the  Farts held out and completed the half with all 11 players on the field, the final result 6 – 3 to the Farts. Willy brought the OJ’s and it was good to drink in the sun for a change.

Highlights – the combinations up the front, good running from Scotty, Ants, Cam and Paul, when these guys were passing the opposition were really struggling to slow it down. Richard L did good distribution and coaching. The talking in the team to call people on and into position.

My MVPs, 3- Legs, 2- Scotty, 1- Cam though Veitchy and Richard also played well and deserved to get mentioned in despatches.
1 to wily for oranges and Glenn again picks up a bonus point for umpiring

2- Legs
2- Scotty
1- Cam
1- Needles

In other developments, Needles was again asked his expert opinion on how the game was transpiring (like last year) "In the first half, I yelled out a few comments to the ref (naturally just encouraging him for the very fine, accurate decisions he was making at the relevant time).
He stopped the game, and called me over to tell me off.
Scotty came to the rescue and, quick as a flash, informed the ref that I was actually talking to him, and not to the ref! Even I hadn't thought of that.
Result: green cards to both Scotty and I.
As always seems to be the case: on those rare occasions when I receive a card, my family just happen to be there, and my boys are now very interested to know precisely what transpired between the ref, Scotty  and I!"

So there we go sports fans, an action packed day, and a good lead in to next weeks clash of the Titans, the Old Farts V The Young Guns.

Ill bring the Oranges, see you all there.

Monday, July 19, 2010

Farts continue winning streak, Are they close to peaking?

Two huge games, both scheduled for the same night,  that was the dilemma confronting the promoters when they realised just last week that the AB’s were scheduled to play at the same time as the Farts on Saturday night.
Frantic calls and emails, late night meetings and outlook calendars shared across continents as they tried to work out all possible combinations of ensuring maximum crowd and television coverage for both events.
In the end the Farts management conceded to moving their game to Sunday night mainly due to have a slightly lower crowd expected.
But what a two nights it turned out to be, the men in black dealt swiftly to the Yappies on Saturday night.  Gaining the upper hand right from the start, the only thing making the final score line look close to reasonable was Dan the Man Craters inability to read the wellington wind, only landing about 25 % of his attempts.  The AB’s came away with a convincing win and a bonus point.
Last night the men in black lined up again, but this time they were the Karori team, and up against much sterner opposition than the Yappies had the night before.
Right from the hit off, the Farts went on attack, and literally camped in the Karori circle, only retreating back to half way when a goal was scored. The farts had all the pressure, and the Karori goalie saved a number of goals.  The Frats really appear to be peaking, and becoming a team.  There was so much passing in the first half that one of the comments in the shed at half time was that we needed to be a bit more selfish and shoot more rather than all the passing! And this was a Frats team with Cam in it!
The action was so fats that this correspondent lost track of sho scored what goals , but when the boys did hit the shed for a well earned break, they were 6-0 up, and I think Legs, Veitchy, Scotty and Cam had all found the back of the net.  Poor Needles had done a “Dan the man”, and after 6 shots still hadn’t got on the score sheet.
Moses had come along to watch the Farts after his horrific injury, and while he had been training hard to regain his peak fitness so he can return, he has been a bit hesitant due to his injuries.  He was on hand to give some sage advice at half time.
The second half was more of the same, with a well struck goal to Cam that rocketed into the back board, this after a 30 metre dribble that had him beat 4 players, (a couple twice I think!).
Needle got onto the sheet, Robbie played a ball to Trapper, who “wall passed” it back to him just inside the circle, Robbie shot at goal but a Karori played blocked it and then tried to clear.  Unfortunately his clearance was firmer hit that Robbie’s, and straight across the front of the goalie to where Needle was standing to slot it home.
Trapper also got a reward for all his hard work, having a shot partially blocked but then diving towards the bobbling ball and reverse stick smacking it into the net.
The boys ended the half 6-1 up, for a combined score of 12-1.  If you include the number of saved and missed shots , the score should have been well over 20, close to 30 , that was the dominance of the Farts.
Hard to pick stand out players form such a impressive Team game.  Legs was all over the place and scored 4 goals, maybe the side bet with Viv did it, the Farts are looking forward to her coming to a future game in the cheerleaders outfit!.  Cam also had a huge work rate and was rewarded with his hat trick. Scotty and Veitchy’s single goals don’t do justice to the efforts they put in for the others to score.  Needles single goal belies the 9 or 10 shots he had.  Also of note Wicky had a huge game, solid in defence, Toddy put his body on the line and helped pick up the pace of clearing the defence in the second half, and Robbie helped keep the Karori scoresheet empty in the first half with a great effort clearing in front of goal after they had beaten Timbo.
This game brings the Farts season tally to 83 goals, not far now to crack a century
3 – Legs – what do you say when he scores 4, sets up a lot of others and goes back in defence
2- Cambo – ditto above except 3 goals
1 – Wicky great game turning defence into attack often
2- Glen – Umpiring and oranges

4 – Legs
3 - Cambo
2 - Scotty
1 – Veitchy
1 – Needles
1 - Trapper

Sunday, July 11, 2010

Farts follow in AB's foot steps

Another huge weekend for sports fans.

While all sports have been in the shadow of the beautiful game this past few weeks, as the world cup gets right to the pointy end, Rugby moved back onto centre stage with the AB’s up against their traditional foes the yappies in the first Tri Nations game.  After trying a few different line ups in recent games, “Ted” went back to some of his seasoned campaigners inc giving Rokocoko a run on position on the wing.


While he didn’t have a “stunning” game, Rokocoko was a solid member of the AB’s team that demolished the Yappies.


Maybe it was watching this that encouraged the Farts management to Give Trapper a run on position on the wing, but what ever it was it really paid off.


The Farts went into the game with a confidence that was kmore than simply knowing that Victoria were 2 players short.  The team has been growing in cohesion and confidence, and it showed. The game started in a fast and open manner, and it wasn’t long efore Cambo broke through at the top of the circle, and passed wide of the flailing goalie to Trapper who was positioned perfectly to guide the ball into the top of the net.


Within minutes he had added a second from a similar position.  It seemed this was gioing to be his game.  Shortly after a perfectly played ball from Robbie was deflected by Trapper perfectly into Cambo's path for him to beat two defenders and the gaolie to score.


More pressure was applied, with the Farts really starting to paly the fast expansive game they are good at, Trapper couldn’t quite run down two long balls, but did get one great pass from scotty that p[ressured the goalie into a save.


Shortly after Trapper had a shot at goal slap into the post and Cambo followed up to slot his second goal.


Veitchy added a goal, latching onto a shot from Scotty that was initially saved.  Vic scored one goal (scored by a Naenae player that was playing for them as they were short). So the boys went to the sheds 5-1 up.


The second half was more of the same, and Trapper had 2 cracking runs, one taking the ball all the way to the backline then pulling it back for Veitchy to score, however he missed it and Cambo was following up to put it away for his third.  Then later collecting a pass from deep in defence found Trapper around half way, he took on and beat two defenders but his shot at goal was blocked by the goalie, however he collected the rebound, and layed it off to cam on the spot to nail the goal.


Cambo added another to round off his 5 goals, and then there was a lovely touch by Wily, getting the ball with a bit of space just outside the LH upright, he deftly lifted the ball over the goalie into the roof of the net to score the Farts 9th.


While as often is the case the glory goes to the goal scorers, the halves and inside forwards did a sterling service in pressuring Vic into giving up possession, then often laying off fast accurate passes to release the forwards.  Nuts (first full game for a while!) and Toddy were solid in their tackling and passing, and Scotty and Veitchy were both tireless workers. In fact the whole team played well, with no players lacking in effort or application tonight



5 -  Cambo

2 – Trapper

1 -  Veitchy

1 – Wily



3 – Cambo – Has to get full points, 5 goals, lots of passing and tireless work in attack and defence, especially after backing up from a game on Saturday night for the P3’s

2 – Trapper – 2 goals, assists for 3 others and a solid performance, (this reporter thinks he nearly deserves the full 3 points)

1 – Scotty – he had a good game, was unselfish in his passing and plenty of back tackling

1 – Glenn – yes he umpired again, boring……………

1 – Craig – great oranges, very juicy and cold, thanks

Wednesday, July 7, 2010

A night of drama and suspense!

A Sunday night, Intrigue, suspense, emotion, action, was it the latest edition of TV1’s “Sunday Theatre”, no it was the Farts v Victoria 4 at NHS2.
A Farts team devastated by injury and absence (will it was down from the usual 17 players to only 13 (plus Glen) warmed up in what were unusual conditions given the recent weather, a hard dry turf, no wind or rain, and mild temperatures. Those that may have passed a casual glance at the opposition may have wondered where their team was, as it seemed to be only half a team warming up at the other end.
When glen blew his whictle for the toss up, it was obvious they only had 9 players. After a brief discussion in the pre game huddle the Farts offered to umpire the other end as well ‘until their extra players arrived”, a sporting gesture to be sure.
Robbie volunteered to umpire some of the first half.
After the hit off,  the game started at a ferocious pace, with rapid far reaching attacks by the farts, and just as quick response  by Vic to shut them down.  Even though they were down to 9 players, it certainly appeared like half of their team were of a higher skill and fitness level, and questions were raised with the umpires.
Vic opened the coring, an embarrassing situation for the Farts, with a full team against 9 by down 1 -0.  The Farts attack seemed to be stunned by the amount of space they had in the middle of Vics half, and threw themselves forwards like Ors attacking in “the return of the king”, onl;y to be repulsed.  Finally Legs latched onto a pass from Veitchy and sent the Farts supporters into levels of relief when we equalised.  However it was short lived when Vic scored again, into the sheds we trudged, 2-1 down.
There was much discussion at half time between glen and Vic about the suitability of their players, as a number had played for their P3 team immediately before our hit off. Glen felt that they were “playing down”, advised the captain accordingly and recorded ton the card that Vic defaulted (as they wouldn’t have had enough players), an action that was to be questioned post game by the judiciary!
Willie had spelled Robbie during the second half, so trapper volunteered to start the second half with the whistle.  The farts seemed to get a second wind, “and a few more PC’s as well” Vietchy scored 3 in what seemed like quick succession, some good field goals, one easy touch on the goal line (should really have been Legs as it was going in but Veitchy claims he finished it off!) and a good flick from a PC. Needle joined in with a cracking shot from near the edge of the circle to score as well.
Vic came back to score 2 more goals, one a high shot at the LH upright that Timbo only managed to just get his stick to and deflect into the top of the net).
The Farts final goal was an awe inspiring effort from Willie who was relishing the space (by this time Vic’s head were down and the players who were playing their second game were at walking pace).  An attack went into the circle, after a skirmish in front of goal the ball came out to willies left side (he was near his post as all wingers should be) , with out a second thought he did a reverse stick shot that even cam would have been proud of, smacking the ball into the roof of the net on the left hand top corner. That was the final nail, trapper tried to get back on to get in on the goals but without him even touching the ball the whistle went 1 minute after he went back on!.
The End result on the night was a 6-4 win to the Farts.
There was some post match judicial inquiry, with Vic claiming that all the players that played Sunday night were actually registered with the R2 team, and had been “playing up” for the P3’s.
Although this correspondent has his suspicions (and voiced them as well) especially as Vic had done this to the Farts in a previous year (the team we played in the semi final had a number of players that we hadn’t played during the normal season but were “officially” registered for our grade) it was suggested and accepted by the administration that the result would stand as we won anyway.
As a famous British general was heard to say after a victorious battle “it was a close run thing”

3 - Vietchy
1 – legs
1 – Wily
1 - Needle

3 – Vietchy – have to after he scored two goals and poached one of legs
2 – Wicky – all round efforts and good solid defence and attack , also umpired last 5 minutes
1 – Timbo , slide tackle took out a Vic player and tried to drop kick into another , managed tocollect his chest
1 – Glen – umpiring
.5 – Trapper – umpired almost half a game
.5 Robbie – umpired part of 1st half and volunteered to do so
.25 wily – umpired part of 1st half

No oranges but vraig has volunteered to do them next sunday